10 Things to Say If You Get Caught Sleeping @ Your Desk

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10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

9. "This is just a 15 minute Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP) they raved about in that mandatory time management course you sent me to."

8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!"

7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"

4. "Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

3. "The coffee machine is broken..."

2. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."

And the #1 best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk...

1. ".....in Jesus' name. Amen."

Naomi Campbell will perform cleaning duties for five days, after being ordered by a Manhattan judge earlier this year to community service as punishment for throwing a cell phone at maid Ana Scolavino.Campbell has been allowed to perform her cleaning duties in private, in a bid to avoid the press. Despite being warned by sanitation boss "not to wear heels" to work, Campbell arrived at the Lower East Side building at 8am in a pair of stiletto boots, although she was also carrying a pair of work shoes. 03.19.07 NYC

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Naomi I love you for your beauty but I'll be damn if all you antics don't crack me up. WHY? WHY did you wear the Communist version of a Girl Scout Uniform??!! With the boots to match!!!

I bet her ass can't even walk in flats.

Amy Winehouse -You Know I'm No Good

Ok for the most part I’m of the opinion that 73.4% of rap music sucks – HARD!! Of course there are a few solid songs out. There’s a Ghostface joint I’m feeling and I had a vision of the girl on the chorus. A Beautiful, Buxom, Black Belle. Then I saw this video – of the girl singing the chorus. Nothing like I envisioned, so now I’m intrigued.

Who is she? Amy Winehouse a singer out of London. Her voice is so soulful it reminds me of the old school singer like Etta James. I just really appreciating her style and I wanted to share.

World's Sexiest Man!!!

I'm so jealous of the girl in the video. I wish Suge Knight would touch me like that just once. *fans self* Suge is a million ways of sexy!

Questions: Work

?Questions?

1.) Do I put the time I got here? or the time I was supposed to get here?
2.) What do I need (to take home) from the supply room?
3.) How the hell do they expect me to hold my breath and say hello?
4.) I know they don't think I'm doing all this work? WTF I look like?
5.) Does co-worker know he could soooo get it? I wonder if he could keep his mouth shut?
6.) Does co-worker know he will never get it?
7.) Why isn't it Friday? or a Payweek?
8.) Why is the Bytch talking to me?
9.) What time is it?
10.) Is putting rat poison in co-workers coffee passive aggressive?

What questions go through your head at work?

News: Slickback & Cellphone

There have been rumours that Terrance “Slickback” Howard has been dating Naomi “Cellphone Knockout” Campbel are dating. Slickback cleared up rumour in an interview with People :

"You gotta remember now, I'm still married." Howard and Lori, 35 – who have two daughters, Aubrey and Heavenly, and one son, Hunter – have been off and on since they married in 1989. "I'm still trying to get my wife back," Howard says. I'm always gonna, you know, till she puts the last nail that coffin, and I'm hoping she don't. "[She] filed for divorce but I'm still trying to campaign. My three kids are campaigning for me, too. They'll make sure that anybody who comes sniffing around gets a bloody nose."

Call me Ghetto but the idea of Naomi and one of Slickback kids fighting is giving me goose bumps.

News: Micheal Jackson

Smiling and waving to screaming fans, Michael Jackson arrived in Japan on Sunday for his second visit in recent years for a party where those paying US$3,500 a ticket get to spend 30 seconds with the pop icon. While in Tokyo, the star will also host a fan art contest for Japanese who cannot afford VIP tickets.
source

My Two Cent: $3,500 for 30 seconds!!! That's $7,000 for a minute!!! That's $420,000 an hour. I need to move to Japan and start turning tricks, cause those folks are just throwing away money. I guess when you're the Kang of Pop (yes kAng) you can do stuff like that. Meanwhile I trying to get an extra $1 at the J.O.B.